Intensity......

It is that look.   Eyes focussed.  Tongue sticking out ever slow slightly.    Concentration in full force. There is the look of  focus on your little face that I could kiss all day long, if only you would just let me!!!    I watch this in you all day long.  You work so hard, I can practically  hear you  thinking.   It does not matter what task is before you.     It doesn't matter what it is...it gets done!  And along the way intensity exudes from you.  But that afterall is you JT.  You are intense.  Sometimes I call it dramatic, but I am pretty sure it is all from the same place...  You are one of a kind JT.   I know this first hand.   Just looking at these pictures, reminds me of  just that.  Some were taken just this week.   Some taken some time ago.   However they all have one thing in common......you and who you are.   

  Then there are the times that your little will and independence come crashing through and you do only what JT wants.  It can also be called another word, stubborn!   Yes, stubborn....it looks like this sometimes:  yelling, running and sliding across the floor  or just flat out refusal to do what you are supposed to.  It is those moments that I question things....especially if I am the ONLY mom that has this kind of..well...intensity.

 I am learning  a  bit of how to handle these times better!   However, I don't think I will ever be fully trained on that.  But, I do stop myself now and remind myself.....this intensity works both ways.   Then I clearly see the  huge positive.

 I think of you  in the future:  college, your job, a husband and father one day......with your committment and intensity to get done with whatever is before you... you will without a doubt be a huge success!   And then this calms my nerves.  This shows me that in the end, all will be just as it should be.   Really no different than right now, as things from one end of the spectrum all the way to the other...are just as they should be.

 You keep going every second of every minute of every hour of every day!   Until finally, you fall into your bed and your pillow.  It is then, only then, that I see you totally calm, in every way.    Our boy, who has worked so hard that day, is now ready to refuel for the next day.   Once those eyes pop open the next morning.....it starts all over again.   And I look forward to it each day.  Just as I look forward to every ounce of joy you keep filling up in  my heart without fail, each and every single day.